Since everyone either went out of town or made plans this weekend, I am left to entertain myself. That normally isn't difficult at all; there's always a thought or a song or a rhyme or a squirrel to harass. But the past few weeks have been such a whirlwind of social interaction, homework, papers, and movies, changes, and minor stress, it's hard to know exactly what to do when left to my own devices. I haven't written much poetry this week either. Its as if I've felt so much and worried so much and enjoyed so much, to such a degree, that I can't even make those emotions universal or transform them into words. But I had a little poetry party in the mall foodcourt today and got a bit of that spark back. I really love poetry. I honestly find it magical when I can honestly free myself to write, using imagery and experiences rather than grandiose abstractions. Those things have been a hindrance lately because I've been trying too hard.
In other news, this semester has been the strangest one of my life. Half the time I feel as if I'm in a dream, a happy one, but it makes things strange nonetheless. Time is moving slowly, but still weeks seem to sneak by and I only notice when they're over. There are really good people in my life, though. Really really good. And even though I feel like God hasn't been speaking in words I can understand or helping me become active or fulfill some specific task, I see the ways in which He is blessing me and changing my perspectives and holding me accountable and forcing me to work for what I want. And I see the ways He is strengthening those who are near to me.
"'But let him who boasts boast about this: that he understands and knows me, that I am the Lord, who exercises kindness, justice and righteousness on earth, for in these I delight,' declares the Lord." (Jer 9:24)
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