The start of the school year is often cathartic. I go through my closet and purge my old clothing to make way for new fall styles. Immersed in the college culture, I learn about new bands, new relationships (and those that turned sour in the summer heat), new students. The quickened pace of a packed schedule is often just what I need to let go of old heartbreaks and insecurities. Here I am again, nearing the end of the first week of my junior year of college, and I feel the need to reflect on who I am, what I've learned, and how, with new resources and new surprises, I can change for the better.
I am imperfect: sometimes reckless, mean, selfish, dramatic. But I want honest, grounded passion, passion that allows me to pursue my interests and my school work with fervor, that encourages me to greet everyone with a smile that lets them know I want to know them; I want to desire to know people. I want a passion that leads me daily, hourly, to Christ, to this grand true story of God watching over us, pitying us, crying out for our attention, forgiving us. I think if I knew that in an intimate, encompassing way at all times, everything would change.
I have made mistakes. I have gossiped and slandered. I have taken for granted my daily blessings. I am ready to find the balance between moving on and feeling guilty for my humanness, to know how to recover and to live each day with joy.
Being here is a blessing. An example, once again of beauty in the broken, in moving forward, in times of change, in deepening relationships and continuing to work toward a degree.
Don't take it for granted.
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